A Pen to a Notebook
by JiseiHakushaku
Summary: When you're tossed into a not-so-fictional world with no obvious way out, you have few options; one is to enjoy the ride, scare your new classmates, and sneakily attempt to piss off a lot of people. Warning: OCs. Earlier chapters being updated. :/
1. Chapter 1

A/n: _**This chapter has been edited for grammar as of February 18**__**th**__**, 2011. Trolololol.**_

No, but seriously. Even for a rewrite, the first chapters of this fic sucked serious [lollipops]. So I'm editing them as best I can. Sorry that I tortured you guys with this, lol!

For those just now coming in, this is a rewrite of a fanfiction I started back in my Suethor days, originally titled "Welcome to Death Note". It told the story of a psycho otaku who found herself in the Death Note world and at Whammy's house, blah blah blah. That fic made it to about 19 chapters when I finally realized how horrid it was, and that compared to my newer works, it just was a stain on my reputation. Hence this being rewritten—and now, edited. Despite the revision, after someone pointed it out, I decided to still keep the spelling of Whammy's House. I know it's more widely spelled as "Wammy's House", but to be honest, I only recently saw that spelling. xD; All the translations that I have referenced while writing this, and the subs that I watched, said "Whammy's", I kid you not. I've tried to curb the habit, but I just cannot seem to! Please forgive me. To me, it's not a big deal, and it makes sense by pronunciation—although I believe it could be spelled either way—there may be a few people out there who are bothered by this. :/

Also, dear FFN's coding,  
Fuck you. I don't want my whole chapter in bold no matter what you say.  
-Dice

Massive author's note, end.

* * *

**Chapter One: Trapped in a Box**

_"May those who follow their fate be granted happiness; May those who defy it be granted glory." – Princess Tutu_

_Click click click click, click click, click, click click click click…_

The rhythmic sound of the teacher's pen clicking continued on, increasing headaches and making each second longer and more unbearable.

The scent of body odor was equally infuriating, with its salty, repugnant smell, and the way you could almost taste it in the air was sickening. The stale scent was strong from the near forty-five years that the school had been in existence, and it seemingly built up by the day.

The grayscale room was depressing; the gray brick walls and cold concrete floors seemed to close in on her, and she wanted to scream. The way her pencil sounded as it scratched against the paper—keeping tune with the way the mathematic equations played in her head—made her feel ill.

_Was it ever going to end?_

Minutes more past, each one feeling like an hour; hell, maybe they were hours! Her sense of time had never been the greatest.

Finally, the ticking of the clock on the wall paused and exchanged itself for an annoying buzz.

_Yes!_

Miss Brightford, the poor, unfortunate geography teacher sighed in the same relief the lone girl in detention felt internally; _at last,_ she could go home to her many Great Danes and forget these bratty children! Said annoying woman with the long face and tight, perfect bun looked up, her harsh expression hiding the relief that sparkled in her eyes.

"You may go home now, Miss Black. Your detention from the day is up; I will be sending further note to your guardians, of course—you know the drill by _now,_ though."

_Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say._

The dark haired girl in the red and navy hoodie and jeans didn't hesitate a second to shove her papers and pencils into the bag, carelessly and unorganized-like, before darting out.

It was everything she could do _not_ to let out an obnoxious laugh of relief and joy; she was so happy to be out of detention that she would willingly sacrifice her character.

Of course, her being there in the first place was all a major conspiracy.

_The world itself was a conspiracy. _

It was all against the free-spirited and equally free-minded souls such as herself. It was all a plot to turn them into boring adults, sucking their originality and freedom until they were mindless drones to be used as fodder for Philosopher's stones or an army of communists.

_Or at least, that's what Arianna Black had always thought._

She'd grown up pretty 'free' compared to how she was now, or how most children were.

Arianna knew all the tricks to getting by with her dad, it was easy. Bat those big gray eyes a little and let some of those dark brown bangs fall into your eyes, all the while pouting slightly and cocking your head and shoulders in just the right manner. Ask politely, always be nice, and hold back the temper if necessary.

Be the daughter he dad wanted, break into a Chevy, and make him realize you're the best in the world.

_It works every time._

Her mom wasn't so easy, considering her 'habits'. But that wasn't a big deal for Arianna.

Arianna lived with her dad most of the time anyways, having no interest in her fraternal relatives or their naturally bland personalities that were overly spiced with drugs and alcohol.

Her dad though… She could relate to him rather nicely.

He was the used car salesman who didn't like to lie, and the person you could always go to.

And the best thing?

She could spaz about anime with him all she liked. He didn't mind it. He was a fan, too. Although, the only series' he _really_ liked were _Death Note, Hellsing, _and _BECK… _That was okay, though. At least it was better than nothing.

At the mere thought, Arianna let out a content sigh, still walking through her school to get out; ah, the memories of a girl watching a psychological thriller like _Death Note_ with her dad on a rainy night, eating cold onion rings and drinking flat generic soda, and once the last onion had been fought over, they'd pull out the marshmallows.

_Oh yes, the marshmallows of god._

But naturally, all good things come to an end.

Arianna's dad had died in a car accident about two years ago, and as her mom was deemed unfit as a parent, she'd moved in with her aunt. And when her aunt went completely insane—_no surprise there, with all the pills she was popping while working the corner_—she was shoved into the hands of the state.

Ohio had never been such a bitch in her eyes.

That's how she got here though. Here, being a cheap-assed little public school, living with a senile old couple who wouldn't even notice if she grew wings and flew off. They were nice and all, and amusing at times, but no young girl dreams of being crammed in a house with fifty cats.

"Arianna!"

Turning around, Arianna saw a young girl running up to her. A smile came over her face, and her bad mood vanished.

"Arianna!" The girl exclaimed again as she tackled the other girl into a hug, grinning. She was flushed and out of breath, but that didn't stop her from clinging. "How was detention, Ari?"

This eight year old girl before her was named Allison Kelly. She'd lived with the old couple Arianna was trapped with a bit after the older girl had arrived, but had been switched to another family soon after. The cute little blonde always seemed to be trailing after Arianna, who was eleven, trying desperately to keep up with the older girl.

With her big blue doe eyes, she was hard to resist.

"It… was as good as it's gonna get." Arianna mumbled, eying the calendar that read March 2013 on its opened page. "I hate the teachers here, I mean, what's their problem? You give them a funny look, and they get all pis—_ticked_ off."

Allison blinked, confused, before shaking her head. "Arianna, you're always getting in trouble lately… I don't like it."

"I'm bored, Allison, sue me." The older girl grumbled. "They took all my anime, and there's not a manga in sight. I can't even find porn on the internet, not that I _like_ porn, but it's the principle that counts! I'm mature for my age, an old soul if you will!"

Allison blinked. The poor girl had no idea what Arianna's rant meant. It was all in the clouds above her head, scrambled up beyond comprehension.

_Then again, when did it not?_

"Anyways, what are you doing around here?" The older of the girls asked, plopping down on the nearby stairwell. She dug in her bag lazily, face blank as she pulled her bag of marshmallows out. There was a barely noticeable light in her eyes as she popped one into her mouth, humming lowly as she sucked it.

"Oh yeah. I'm not going to be seeing you for a while, Ari…" Allison said sadly.

"…" Arianna blinked, quiet; she swallowed the marshmallow in her mouth whole with ease. "Hm?"

"My mommy is better, Ari! I get to go back with her!" Allison grinned. "You could visit sometime, too. And you'll have to see me off. I'm going back home!" She repeated excitedly.

Arianna wasn't listening. She couldn't believe it.

Now her best friend was being pulled away by the system. They took her culture, now _her_ Allison.

That was just… _evil._

Maybe she shouldn't be so cruel. Maybe she should be happy for her friend; after all, Allison hadn't gotten to really ever live with her mother. Like Arianna's mother, her mother was 'worthless shit' to the world. _Does shit get better? No, it does not. It does not. _Arianna mused, frowning. _Allison won't be happy there. She'll cry all the time. The only person… I'm the only one who can care about her properly. No one gets that. Why don't they understand that she's better with me than her mom? I'm not going to run out on her. I never would do that…_

"Arianna?"

"Sorry, spaced out…" Arianna sighed, pushing back her frustration. "She's been working so hard to be good for you. I _am_ glad you get to go home… You're going to be so happy with her, and I'm sure she'll never fu—_mess_ up again."

Lies, lies, all lies.

Allison grinned and nodded. "Mhm!" She chirped.

_The least I can do is make her feel better about it… _Arianna sighed, grimacing a bit. _I'd much rather her be realistic and realize what a terrible bitch her mom is, but then she'd cry… God, why are kids so hard to deal with? I hate this. Allison needs to buck up and realize her mom's useless. It's better to get over it quick. Like ripping off a Band Aid…_

The little blonde dug into Arianna's marshmallows, giggling.

_You're lucky I love you._

"Hey now, what'd we say about stealing?" She sighed, a small, amused smile on her face. "We only do it…"

"…to people with money?" Allison guessed, before grinning. "Like Robin Hood!"

"…Sure." Arianna raised an eyebrow. Robin Hood, _sure,_ she could deal with that.

Sighing, the brunette looked out the nearby window. Without Allison here, there was no point in her staying either. No point in catering to The Man and following The Rules, playing The Game that she never wanted to start in the first place. There was not point here for her at all…

Arianna grimaced; she wouldn't do _anything_ without a point in it.


	2. Chapter 2

A/n: Hey everyone, back for chapter two! I'm glad to see so many familar names in the reviews, and even some new ones unless my memory fails me. I realized that last chapter I forgot to mention that the quote was indeed from Princess Tutu (I've never read this series myself, but, my friend does and I just love this quote from it, haha), thanks to the reviewer who pointed it out!

Well, I still own nothing except for OCs and the plot, and, well, you get the idea, right?

Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter Two: Superb Plans**

"_No matter how fast time goes, how fast fate goes, I know there's only one thing for sure. Thinking to myself, from being lost in this moment; Tomorrow, I'm going to go forward." – Sentimental Moment_

*******

She'd always been pretty smart for her age, able to plan well and so forth. But the now eleven year old Ariana was floored by how such a juvenile escape plan could work out so well.

The plan?

Grab your shit, jump out a window, and run like a bat outta hell before someone catches you. Or, just go poof and never be noticed as missing until it's too late.

Of course, the latter (and smarter) plan should be applied to making this mad dash on the way home from school. Not during class.

Ariana just couldn't take it anymore. She had all her necessities in her backpack, and when the teacher lectured her about being late, she snapped and dashed out the first story window. Her philosophy in life was 'why the hell not', after all.

*******

Ariana sat in the tree, perfectly hidden and smirking as the social workers ran around frantically, shouting her name as loud as they could.

_Man oh man,_ The dark haired girl thought happily, _I am such a freaking genius! They'd never look up one of the tallest trees in the park for me! Ha! I deserve some kind of award for this, maybe… No, a bag of marshmallows. Yes, the poofy big ones…_

"Ariana Black!" One of them shouted. "Where are you?"

"No where you'll ever find me." She muttered, smirking wider. Arianna was currently having a rather sadistic moment, finding the pain of a certain teacher in too-high heels absolutely amusing.

"Damn it, where is that girl…?"

Arianna sighed quietly and leaned back against the thick trunk, relaxing. She might be up there for a while, after all. Why not get as comfortable as she could in the meantime?

This led to her limited attention span acting up though, and she sighed. Eleven year olds, no matter how much of a ninja they could be, did not enjoy tedious amounts of time spent being quiet and motionless in trees.

Especially not Ariana. She was hyper and crazy usually, but now she was tired and bored.

So. So. So. So very bored.

"Stupid boring hiding place…" She grumbled, digging through her backpack as carefully and quietly as she could. "Burn in hell, darn you…"

Finally, she found something to amuse her. Many would cock their heads and wonder how this could amuse an eleven year old hyperactive girl, but at just the thought of the book, Ariana's brain gears started whirring.

The book was a graphic novel, or manga, titled _Death Note _in a white, sophisticated font. On the cover was a crouched man with messy black spiked hair, and large dark eyes, with his thumb to his lip. He wore no shoes or socks, and his clothing was simple jeans and a white cotton shirt.

Arianna grinned at this man's drawn image. If she had to pick any fictional character to be her favorite, she'd pick this man.

_L Lawliet._

She admired him quite a bit, though she'd never really admit it. She thought the man was a genius, and hell, he was. What she liked about him was his abilities to lie and manipulate—a messed up philosophy, maybe, but she liked that quality. Maybe it was because lies and manipulation help build foundation to a good strategy, and she liked strategies.

And Death Note always had been her favorite thing in the world.

Two years ago, while in a bookstore with her dad, she'd found the manga mistakenly put right beside the Pokemon books, and asked her dad if she could read it. He read the first book, and figured it couldn't hurt. As said before, she'd always been kind of mature for her age. It wouldn't be that big of deal, would it?

So he read it. She read it. They read it together. They joined the group on Facebook. They watched the anime and the movies and lurked the forums.

Both Ariana Black and Mitchell Black loved the series known as 'Death Note'.

Ariana grinned, looking at L.

It was time to read.

*******

Ariana frowned as L's death scene concluded, Light's victorious smirk pissing her off.

She hated that L, Mello, Matt, and of course Watari had died. It was an injustice to the fandom.

And yet she loved the series no less. She was hooked.

She flipped to the page where Wammy's house was briefly shown, and smirked.

"Why couldn't I have ended up there?" Ariana asked herself quietly. "I wish that would happen. I'd love to be at Wammy's… And I'd do something cool, like keep L and Mello and Matt dying and destroy Kira…" She cackled under her breath at the idea, rubbing her hands together as her childish imagination overflowed with visions of kicking ass.

_If I could only have one wish, one wish in my whole life, then I'd love to go to some alternate universe like Death Note… !!! _Arianna chibisobbed in her head, tugging at her bangs in frustration. "I wanna go to Death Note!!!" She growled, not caring anymore if a social worker, teacher, cop, or random bystander heard. "I promise to save L and Mello and Matt and shit, I just wanna gooooo!!!"

_**Fine then. You'll go.**_

Ariana blinked and looked around. Who'd said that?

There was a small sinking feeling in her stomach. Her lame fangirl moment had gotten her caught, and now she'd escape or pay the price of failure. Picking up the book from her lap, she looked at the page, intending for this to be her last glance before putting it away and running like a madman. But something was different.

She eyed the panel of the manga with Wammy's. Why did it suddenly look all colorful, and 3D? _As if it was real almost…_

Suddenly, the soccer ball Mello and the other kids had been playing with in said panel seemed to enlarge. It looked realer as well, with spots of wearing out, and being used frequently. It kept growing bigger on the page, quicker and quicker, with more color and detail that normal.

Arianna was now firmly freaked out. "W-what the?!"

In the blink of an eye, something hard hit her in the face, and she could literally feel her nose crack before her eyes saw stars of pain.

The next thing she knew, she'd fallen out of the tree, and was near a very warm orange light. Something smelled like it was burning, and the sounds of sirens were behind her.

As she looked up, face to face with a burning building, one thing could be absolutely certain.

Never before had Ariana Black been so confused.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note, Olivious, Black Black Gum, Higurashi, or... any other form of copyrighted chiz. I own my original characters and the plot.

* * *

**Chapter Three: Cloud of Frustration**

"_When you fall asleep, your dreams will be safe. There is nobody here, so the mesmerizing light of the stars will last forever…" – A Little Pain, Olivia_

*******

There's something kind of funny of sitting in the front lawn of a place you've never seen before, yet feel like you should know, especially when this place—yeah, the same one right in front of you—is burning to the ground before your eyes, and then behind you is a mass of firetrucks and an ambulance or two.

Yep. Complete and endless funniness there, alright.

Ariana blinked a few more times before coughing, holding her sleeve over her eyes as the wind changed directions and a bunch of smoke went into her eyes.

_Where the hell am I?! _She growled, jumping but not resisting as two someone's grabbed her arms and started tugging her away from the building.

"Little miss, are you alright?" Someone asked a little too loudly for her taste. Her mind was still making an effort to process what was going on.

How do you fall out of a tree during the daytime, and land in front of a burning building at night? It's kind of one of those lifetime mysteries eleven year olds can't figure out so easily, she guessed.

"YES!" She snapped, in response to the nagging fellow in her ear. "I am perfectly fricking fine! I'm alive, I think, and I don't feel any limbs missing. I call that 'fine'!" _Although, I said nothing about mental stability, which is still being questioned at the present time. Yep. Definitely questionable here. Hey, is that ambulance guy British? Nifty._

"Bloody 'ell…" A fireman said, sighing as he came up to them. "Where'd she come from? We canvassed the 'ole place… She'd be the only one t' get out."

Ariana slapped her forehead. _I wasn't even in the damn fire to begin with, you genius! And why are you all suddenly British?! This is Ohio, we're all a bunch of… Ohioans! Damn!_

"'Eadache, kiddo?" One of the men from the ambulance asked. "We'll need to get you to the 'ospital on the double, kiddo."

_Like Hagrid, you do not pronounce the letter 'h', I see. _Ariana mused sarcastically. "And just why in the name of the almighty puppeteer would I want to do that, Mister?"

"You just were in a 'uge fire, love. You got the right mind to be sore in some way."

_Aha. Logic wins around here, Englishman._

"Now, I'll be needin' your name."

"I'm Ariana Black." Ariana answered, rubbing her head. She was rather confused as she listened to the chaotic clamor around them. Everyone here had an English accent but her and one of the firemen about thirty feet away, manning the hose. His accent had a clearly French ring to it, though, so that didn't count to her in a way.

She looked at the burning building, putting a tighter hold on her backpack. "Damn. What the hell happened there?" She asked softly. The ambulance man who'd been talking to her blinked twice; his face was showing obvious confusion.

"You were in the fire, kiddo. Everything's gone, and everyone…" His voice echoed pity and compassion for Ariana, as if there was something to be sad about. Very sad, actually. As if she'd lost a home and the friends with it.

…A revelation for Ariana there. Obviously, they thought that she had something to do with this place, whatever it may be.

The girl ran a hand through her hair, still as confused as one can imagine someone being in a situation like this. _Okay, calm down, think this through. You don't know where you are, but it's kind of weird here, no duh. Like England or something. So, again, I don't know where I am, or who anyone is. And this situation… Don't know that, either. You got a bad card on this one, Ariana. _She chided herself, only half sarcastic. _Geez, what am I doing? No wasting time… Until I can figure out where I am, I just gotta think on my feet quickly, and lie my butt off. Just like always. And if I'm caught in a lie, blame a concussion. Yep, perfect._

"Girl, y'alright?" Another ambulance worker asked her.

Time to set the plan into action.

"Y-yeah," She choked, biting the side of her mouth as hard as she could for a moment, feeling her eyes water a bit instinctively as she hugged her bag to her torso tightly. "J-just… r-realizing what happened… It's k-kinda painful, and confusing… W-why…?" She whimpered. "M-My head hurts! I want my t-teddy bear!" She sobbed, jabbing a sensitive area of her wrist with her backpack zipper and picturing a poor dead platypus until the waterworks could come.

The reaction from the workers was to be expected. They panicked at the crying girl, who'd also said she had a headache, and put her on a bed in said ambulance, preparing to go off.

As unappealing as the idea of a hospital visit sounded to Ariana, she knew she had to roll with it for now.

Smirking to herself in light satisfaction when no one was looking, she watched the fading scene of the burning building warily. The sign by the road said _Fairborn's House_, and it took little to piece together that Fairborn's was the burning place.

But this still explained little. Where was she, and how did she get there?

*******

"_Doctor Bennett to ICU. Doctor Bennett to ICU."_

Ariana relaxed as best she could for being in an uncomfortable hospital waiting room, sighing as all the frantic grown-ups scampered around hurriedly. The fuss-and-buss of daily hospital grind was endless it seemed, and she could find means of entertainment through watching it. Not to mention, listening in on conversations was proving itself to be a rather useful tool. No one really paid mind to an eleven year old girl reading a ratty hospital copy of _Goblet of Fire _in the corner, now did they?

Nah, they didn't. Or at least, they didn't seem to, as the week and a half she'd been in this hospital had gone by without much suspicion.

In that time, she'd figured out that the Fairborn's House was near to a town called Dursley, and she was now at a hospital in Cainscross. Both towns were in Gloucestershire, and this was in England. The year was 1999, and it was May. The exact date though, she'd forgotten, although she was sure it was Tuesday.

She'd also discovered that Fairborn's House was a very small childcare home run by the church of the town is was located in, dedicated solely to protecting children who'd lost their parents from being tossed around by the system into bad situations. It provided a stable environment in the country to kids until they were of legal age. It was admirable to Ariana, moral-wise, but the downside of being so secluded and small was that there seemed to be some neglect by the government. Paperwork never seemed to be filed correctly, and things could easily escape the system.

But this misfortune in tax filing seemed to be Ariana's lifesaver. If all her papers were lost, then she could quite easily blend in as the only survivor of this fire, and take advantage of anything she could get out of it.

Of course, a tiny little part of her felt bad for abusing the privileges of all the dead people. But then again, Ariana had very little compassion for death unless she knew the person dying. She did not know these people, and was basically unable to harbor great sadness or pity for them, outside of the false emotion she put on for her act.

_Not that this 'act' isn't causing me a little trouble, _she mused. _Everyday I've had to talk to different government-y people and social workers about where I'm going next. Heh, even here, in a different continent, it's like I don't fit. No place to be._

Sneakily, Ariana shoved the Harry Potter book into her backpack, and pulled out the Death Note manga she'd been reading earlier. The page had gone back to normal, it seemed, as if nothing had happened.

"_**Fine then. You'll go."**_

She still had yet to know who's voice that was, if it was even real. _Geez, what am I thinking… It was in my imagination! I was stressed and sleepy… No worries._

Ariana shook her head, flipping casually through the drawn pages of the Death Note manga, contemplating this predicament. She seemed to not only be in a different country, but, had gone back in time. Which, as we all know, is currently impossible in this day and age. _That settles it, I fell out of the tree, and am in a coma. Simple as that. All of this is a wild a hallucination that, when I wake up, will be used by grown ups to 'prove' sugar and television and happiness are all bad for children's brains._

"Sweetie," Ariana looked up as a nurse came over, smiling politely. "I've come to escor' you to wherever you need t' be 'bout now. Lavatory, lunch…"

_Thank you for putting both of those in the same sentence. _"Sure…" Ariana sniffled, putting on that sad, lost little puppy act. "Ah, you remind me of one of the caretakers back home… So nice…" She whimpered, standing and rubbing her eyes fakely. "Still hard t-to believe… Um… Yes. I-I'd like some lunch…"

The nurse made a pitied face, patting her on the head before leading her off towards the food. Ariana inwardly cringed; some people just saps for sob stories, it seemed.

"I hear that today they're finding a place you can go live at." The nurse chirped. "I bet you'll be right pleased to be gettin' out o' this 'ere place."

Ariana blinked. So they were sending her to another home now? This she had not been informed of prior.

When the arrived at the cafeteria place, the nurse placed Ariana at a table and asked her preferences before skipping off to get her a meal. The young girl sighed, digging into her backpack and pulling out her homemade duct-tape wallet, looking through it in hopes there would be something useful.

_Fiddlesticks. Nothing in here. _She sighed in defeat, listing through all the little things in her head. _School ID, ten dollar bill, used iTunes gift card, expired coupons to Burger King and Chic-Fil-E… Ah, there's my report card, right next to the detention slip I was supposed to present to my beloved guardians…_

By this time, the nurse had scampered back with a tray of food, smiling. "Here you go!" She smiled, sitting it down. Ariana nodded, sitting the contents of her wallet on the table and digging into the ham sandwich on her plate. The nurse eyed the contents as she sat down nosily, blinking at the report card. "May I 'ave a look, dearie?' She asked.

"Go ahead." Ariana grumbled, devouring the food like a wild animal.

The nurse nodded, tucking a strand of her light brown hair behind her ear as she took the report card. Mostly As, with good notes from the teachers it seemed.

Ariana was indeed a good student. She paid attention to what was important, and had a knack for taking decent notes and remembering what she read. She had a study strategy that she used, and it never seemed to fail. Of course, she did have moments of laziness or a rebellious phase, in which she existed solely for pissing her teachers off, it seemed.

"No need to look so surprised." Ariana deadpanned, taking a drink of her soda. She knew she looked nothing at all like a smart kid. "It's all a strategy. You have to figure out the best way to lay out those books and notes for your learning type and figure it out. Once you get the jest of it, it isn't that hard."

The nurse just blinked. "Mind if I keep this, for the worker getting your files together?"

"Yeah, yeah. Just tell me you've got some marshmallows around her somewhere." _Because no meal is complete without marshmallows._

*******

"Now that we've got your files worked out, we can start calling the homes and orphanages to see where to put you. I already have one place in mind, I just need to call my mate there and see—"

"Orphanage?" Ariana asked. "I'm not being shoved into one of those." The very idea of being labeled 'orphan' pissed her off.

The social worker just eyed her for a moment, reminding her wordlessly that her opinion on where she went from here did not matter, nor did it affect the decision-making process in the slightest.

"Yeah, yeah…" Ariana shrugged it off. She still wasn't happy with it though.

The man in the suit picked up his phone and sent her to the waiting room. Through the glass door, Ariana could see him tapping his pen on the paper while laughing happily. She thought the laughter, in the context, was a bit annoying, but just looked away.

_If this is a comatose dream, it's sure a boring one. _She grumbled inwardly, listening to the sound of the clock ticking. _Couldn't a random bunny just hop out and start singing to me, so I know this isn't real?_

Quite a bit of time passed. No bunnies came, and the social worker did not call her back in, even after the phone call was done. Still clinging to her backpack, Ariana sighed.

She just wanted to understand what was going on.

*******

_Tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock…_

_Ring, ring, riiiiiing…_

_Tap, tap, taptap, tap, tap, taptap, tap, tap, taptap, tap…_

_Tick, tock, tick, tock…_

The sound of a clock, a cell phone, and a pen tapping.

All of these sounds, together, make one single sound.

The sound of a child going insane.

Three hours Ariana had been waiting now. Every second seemed to drag on for double the time, making every minute longer, and then every hour longer from there. Not to mention, the place she was stuck in was boring, and she was getting very hungry. The slow, boring pace of the day was exhausting, and all she wanted was a bag full of marshmallows. Right now, the dark haired girl hated nothing more than the world around her, and wished it all would just die or something.

No, not die. That would be boring. Maybe it could all just spontaneously turn purple. _Yes… That'd be cool. Ooh! And this chair can turn into a giant edible marshmallow…_

She sighed in contentment, imagining a world entirely of marshmallow substance. She'd eat that world until there was nothing left, even if she ended up being the size of a whale with a mouthful of cavities. She'd even eat the people, if they were made of marshmallow.

That truly would be a great day.

Suddenly, the unchanging environment… _changed_.

The main door into the office opened, causing an annoying chime to ring. The sound make Ariana jump, then wince from the sudden movement as she eyed the intruder into the boring bubble.

It was an old man with a large white mustache (matching his white hair), and glasses. He was dressed rather nicely in a black suit, and when he saw her, he smiled kindly.

Ariana deadpanned at the smile, and looked away with a frown and furrowed eyebrows. The old man just chuckled as he walked into the office. Brushing some dark hair out of her eyes, she glared at the floor, frustrated with confusion.

That man… He seemed so familiar to her somehow.

The person he reminded her of… Well, that was preposterous in itself. It had to be someone else then. Maybe a random guy off of the street or news, perhaps a patient at that blasted hospital? Someone though. Someone she most likely knew, if the sense of déjà vu was leaning in the right direction.

She huffed, and pulled some _Black Black _gum she'd gotten at a bookstore back home. Wherever home was, be it an alternate universe or back in the US. (The easiest thing to say would be she got in back in Ohio, but, whatever). She popped a piece in her mouth and chewed angrily.

Whoever he was, she wanted to know who he reminded her of.

Not knowing killed her brain cells.

One could say it killed them with a bloody hatchet as if they were the victim characters in a Higurashi arc, but less amusing.

She smirked, and wrote that analogy down for further use.

There went another minute and twelve seconds out of god knows how long she'd be there.

* * *

A/n: This chapter was a bitch to write, but hey, now things can get interesting. =w=''

Review, no flames, hope you enjoyed.

-Dice


	4. Chapter 4

A/n: And at last, this chapter is out. I've been going through a lot with stuff lately, discovered some new animes and manga (Kaichou Wa Maid-sama is amazing as far as shoujo goes, not to mention Air TV, Clannad, and Angel Beats!. My friend is forcing me into the Key Visual Arts fandom, so we'll see how that goes). And did anyone hear that Vampire Knight is getting dubbed, with Vic Mignogna as Zero no less? I'm rather excited for this. :P

But, enough for my anime rambles. There's a new fanart of Spade (Arianna) and Matt up on my dA, entitled 'Harrassment', which includes a short story I wrote a while back. ;3 Check it out if you can~

Disclaimer: The person writing this FanFiction would like to point out that it is _FanFiction, _goddammit, and here for a reason. The reason being the person writing it owns squat, save for Original Characters, plot devices, and the occasional witty phrase.

* * *

**Chapter Four: Opportunistic**

_I Wish You Were Here – Lady Gaga_

- Page Cut -

_Just keep… sitting. Just keep sitting. Just keep sitting till you die~._

Arianna could just deadpan, now unable to stop her brain from singing. This had to be the most boring time of her life.

At the same time that everything was going abysmally slow, it had all happened so fast. Now that she thought about it, she probably had some mental whiplash. Maybe that was why her brain was singing…

Practically out of the blue, Arianna was pulled from her thoughts by the creak of the door, followed by the sound of it closing. She watched absently as the smiling old man, carrying a manila envelope, wandered over to her.

"Hello, young miss." He greeted.

_So goddamn familiar! _Arianna internally growled.

"Hi." She mumbled, deciding to play it as a shy girl. "Who are you, Mister?" Shy could still be straight to the point, right?

He smiled at her more, holding out his hand. "My name is Mr. Whammy. And from what I hear, you're Arianna."

Arianna did not respond, much less heard anything said after his name.

She knew that name. She knew it well.

_Mr. Whammy… Quillish Whammy, also known as Watari. He's the guy that works with L, and is the founder of Whammy's House… _She gulped slightly, literally feeling all the blood wash from her face. _But no! That's… It's freaking impossible! _Death Note _is a fictional story—a manga, dammit—and Whammy's house is equally nonexistent!_

Mr. Whammy blinked at her expression, and tilted his head to the side. "Are you feeling alright? Oh, you're hungry, aren't you? You've probably been here all day."

"I can't deny that this place is incredibly boring." Arianna said blankly. "If I look at something funny, they snap at me not to touch it. This, quite frankly, is a bit rude, since they had no way of knowing what my intentions may have been. That attitude actually makes me want to take one of their overpriced ash trays and slam it onto the ground. But, that'd make me a brat, and then I'd get shit about it. Kid-kind already gets enough BS, why increase it?"

"I see." Mr. Whammy blinked. Usually, this wasn't the response he got. Then again, it was rare enough for him to go receive the children himself. _Roger had enough on his hands today, though, and I wasn't nearly as far off as he was. _"Well then, why not get out of this boorish place and into the sunshine? It's quite a lovely day out."

_He really used the word boorish right then, didn't he? _Arianna deadpanned. "Sure. Sounds good, sir. And I do believe I'll be taking you up on that food offer." She added, as her stomach made a shameless growl. "But wait, is it not a generally accepted rule that young girls like me don't go off with older gentlemen such as yourself?" Not that that 'rule' had stopped her much in the past.

That man in the van had offered candy, and damn straight, she was getting that candy.

She _had, _of course, been scolded by the safety officer in charge of the drill for her 'reckless actions'. But it was worth it for that lollipop.

"You are correct, young lady." The older man smiled. "But, I am not any old man."

"…You're a bit tall to be a leprechaun, though, I'm afraid. All my suspicions just got flushed down the toilet."

He chuckled. Ah, children were amusing to him. The one he worked around—though he loved the boy dearly, as if he were his own son—never cracked jokes.

"Actually, I own a rather prestigious orphanage for gifted children, called Whammy's House." Mr. Whammy said, and Arianna raised an eyebrow.

…_I must be on that PUNK'd show, with Ashton Kutcher. Seriously now, where's Ashton? Is he behind that desk?_

The girl cleared her throat. "Interesting. So, what brings you here? I don't see any brainchildren wandering around with the cure to the common cold."

"Well, I may not see a cure to the common cold," Whammy began, "but I see young lady with potential, in need of a place to reside."

Arianna looked up at him in surprise. This was all practically being pulled out of a fanfiction, in her opinion, though she said nothing.

"But that is for neither here nor there, it can be discussed after the young lady in question has been fed."

Arianna blushed slightly as her stomach made another loud, obnoxious growl.

"Aheheh… Got any marshmallows?"

- Page Cut -

Mr. Whammy may not have been carrying a wagon of marshmallows, but he was not unprepared for a hungry prepubescent girl. He was armed with what was, to her, an unlimited amount of money and a knowledge of good places to eat.

He'd give her the money and let her go inside, getting what she wanted while watching from the car. She had lunch at one café, desert at another, and coffee after it all to wash it down. She wondered why she was receiving this attention, but figured that she'd know sooner or later.

_If I really had to place a guess on anything, _she mused, _they likely saw the flaw in my story and know I wasn't involved with that orphanage that burnt down. That, or they did buy it, and an invite to Whammy's has been extended unto me… Ah, but that'd be straight out of fanfiction, right? That doesn't happen in real life at all!_

Then again, she was nearly convinced that she'd been teleported into a manga. Why was she possibly being invited to a genius orphanage again?

"Thanks for the meal." Arianna finally said, as the car seemed to aimlessly drive around. She got the feeling that she was being buttered up, and scratched at her backpack nervously.

"Are you smart, Miss Black?" Mr. Whammy asked, keeping his smile. The old man had a way of popping a topic right in, and was impossible to read.

"…" She thought for a moment. "If you're asking if I get good grades, yeah."

School had always sort of come easily to her, actually. She usually never had much to do, so she studied a lot. Plus, the only television available to her was usually the public access educational stuff. She also loved history, in a slightly obsessive way. When she could use the internet, it's usually what she would look up.

While most kids were battling Pokémon, she was battling boredom with school.

"Do you enjoy learning?" He asked her.

"Yes." Her answer was nearly immediate. "What I mean is… I like knowing things, so that when I speak, I don't sound stupid. I'm competitive, and whenever my grade beats someone else's… It's impossible to describe, that feeling." When her dad would smile and pat her head, saying she'd done a job well done… Nothing beat that. At all. "And plus, some stuff isn't so bad. Learning science is cool at times. Wars are interesting, especially thinking about the motives behind them… And culture…"

"What career would you like to have?"

…_I think I get it now. _She internally muttered. _This is… a test. Or an interrogation. No, it's an interview._

"I'd like to be historian, or a journalist, or a powerful CEO of either Geico, or Toyota." Arianna said honestly. _Pwning Toyota would be rather cool._ "Or… perhaps a detective. I do enjoy crime shows and stuff…"

In actuality, she'd never even considered becoming a detective. The possibility never seemed to occur to her. But now that it was sitting in the car beside her… it seemed incredibly appealing.

In its own way, at least.

"If that is the case, then why not try attending Whammy's House?"

"… Are you always so direct, sir?" Arianna asked.

Mr. Whammy chuckled. "Subtly wasn't required, was it? Very well then, I am guilty as charged."

"Aha." She muttered, looking out the window of the car. _This could be a great opportunity for an education; the kind I've always wanted, in fact. And also, there's a potential for a purpose here… _"Yes sir, then. I would love to attend this 'Whammy's House'."

He blinked. "Don't you think that was a sudden decision?"

"Well, in this case, I don't have a much a choice. It's better to go to a place like your 'Whammy's House' than to 'Bob's Neighborhood Home for Kids Who Can't Spell 'Neighborhood''." She deadpanned. "Not to mention… I have my own reasons for choosing to attend." _Ones I don't plan to share with you. _"If my choice ends up hitting me in the face for whatever reason, then it's my own fault, and I'll just have to get over it and deal."

Mr. Whammy seemed to think over he response for a while, making an awkward silence for both of them.

"Well then, congratulations, and welcome."

- Page Cut -

"What do you mean by 'she ran away'?" Allison whimpered, wiping a tear from her face. "Ari was going to see me off! She's my best friend!"

"I'm sorry, sweetie." The older brunette woman said as they stood in front of the school, her voice and face filled with pity. "But Miss Black just ran off. They'll find her soon though, she couldn't be far off!"

"B-but…" Allison wailed. "But by then it'll be too late! I'm leaving right now!"

"I know!" The woman said, pouting sympathetically. "But maybe, when she comes back, her guardians can drive you over to see you!"

Allison sniffled, stomping her foot and throwing her teddy bear on the ground. "I hate you, Ari! You forgot about me and left!"

"N-now—"

"_I hate you, Ari! I hate you more than anything!_"

* * *

A/n: Well, there we have it.

EDIT - FF hates page cuts now. Sorry for confuzzlingness.


	5. Chapter 5

A/n: Yeah, I decided to update a little bit early, heheh. As in... about 5 days early. Really, I'm on a writing frenzy thanks to inspiration provided by a certain homunculus bunny you all know and love as Vampire Note. By the way, she has an epic Death Note fic out now, which must be checked out. ...Can I use a Geass via FF? Because I'd appreciate being able to use it.

Also, this is the last chapter of the Arrival Arc, as it will be called. From this point on, it's gets... Whammyfied. Yes. Whammyfied. I have invented yet another uselessly epic word. =w=

Disclaimer: xXImmortalsxDiceXx - me- only owns the plot and OCs. I'm sure there was some fail grammar in that there this disclaimer, but oh wells.

* * *

**Chapter Five: Whammy's House**

_Welcome Home – Metallica _

- Page Cut -

"_I hate you, Ari!"_

Arianna's head snapped up, and a hand went to her forehead. She was a bit sweaty, and panting, but alive. She had no idea why Kenpachi Zaraki had been chasing her in her dream, but in all reality (or in all _not_-reality), it was probably better not to know.

As the sound of her breathing softened, she could hear the sounds from outside, and blinked.

_Laughter, running… Generic playground sounds…_

She groaned loudly, flopping back onto the nice and warm bed. Her brain flickered to the only possible explanation; she'd been caught, and tossed back into the system she despised so much. "Damn it… I thought I was out of here…" She mumbled, cringing, before taking a deep breath.

Looking around now, though, she could tell that this place was different. It was a hell of a lot nicer than any foster home she'd ever been. It didn't smell like dirty diapers. It didn't feel crowded at all.

She had a room to _herself._

"…" Arianna eyed a note on the beside table, marked with a strangely familiar logo. "What?" She muttered, opening it quickly.

_Dear Miss,_

_Feel free to unpack and settle into your new dormitory. Behind the door to the right of your bed, by the dresser, you'll find a bathroom. You do have to share it with your female neighbors, but, that should not be a problem. As soon as you're settled, please report to Roger's office._

_Thank you._

"…How hospitable of them." She grumbled, crumpling the note into a ball as memories started returning. She still felt a bit groggy, and wasn't sure where she was, exactly.

Looking around the room, she felt like she was in some sort of small hotel room. Except a whole lot nicer. The hardwood floors were a light color, and were sleek and nicely polished. The room wasn't too big, but perfect size for one girl.

The furniture in the room was simple, yet classy; a twin bed, a dresser, a desk, and a rolling chair to go with it. There was a floor lamp by the desk, and by her bed was a small beside table with a lamp. All was made out of the same wood, and the lamps were black.

She shook her head, deciding to inspect it further, before rolling out of bed to get her things out of her bag.

"Toothbrush, jeans… Ah, there it is, there we go…" She mumbled to herself.

With a sigh, she wandered through the door into the shared bathroom. There were two doors, both of which could be locked. There were toiletries—tooth brushes, shampoo, etc—all labeled with names (except for a few in a basket, that were obviously brand new and likely for her). But, Arianna got the feeling that the bathroom wasn't used often. She wondered why, as it seemed perfectly nice.

_Oh well. Their loss, I suppose. _She figured, moving to the sink to brush her teeth. After that was finished, she locked both doors and hopped into the shower. She hoped her new neighbors weren't asleep, but hadn't heard movement the whole time before getting inside to wash. _Again, oh well._

- Page Cut -

She'd been quick to wash, dry, and get dressed, but Arianna certainly took her time setting things up in her room.

_The note said to unpack and get settled. I see no problem in making myself at home considering that. _She mused.

Arianna looked out the window a few times, but not for long. She hadn't been too interested in the kids playing outside—she'd seen plenty of rambunctious children running around pointlessly in her short lifetime—but occasionally, one boy caught her eye. A blonde, dressed in black. Possibly leather.

Her eyes trailed after him for a bit as he played soccer—or, as these English kids called it, 'football'—curiously wondering if he was who she thought he was. Arianna smirked slightly when he kicked the ball a little too hard, and it hit a boy in the face. The game paused, and he stopped running to catch his breath for a moment.

At that time, his eyes looked up at her in confusion, before his attention was called back to the game.

Arianna took that moment to disappear from the window, smirking again when she heard the shouts, though she couldn't exactly make out what was being said.

"Bloody hell, Mello! Get your head in the game!"

"Shut up, I'm playin'! Why don't you watch where your teammates' heads are, instead of worrying about me?"

"Pfft!"

- Page Cut -

"Roaaar…" Arianna grumbled, stomping through the castle-like Whammy's House. Mr. Whammy had said the place was 'a fair enough size', but really, that was an understatement.

She wished she knew how big the White House back in the States was, because she was sure that this place was kicking it's ass by a good few feet.

… Well, maybe not, but really. Who knew?

_Hm, if I was a big, scary orphanage runner who preferred bugs to kids, where would I be hiding?_

Turning a corner, her question answered itself.

_Perhaps behind a pair of big, gaudy doors._

Wandering to the doors, she eyed the knobs with a scowl.

Arianna had never really been one to run from anything she didn't like or was nervous about, but neither was she known as exactly the most brave eleven year old on the block. Being at a place like Whammy's House would seem like a dream come true to just about anyone, whether they were familiar with the not-so-fiction world it resided in or not, Arianna especially so. But, now faced with the idea of being here permanently, she wasn't so assured.

What about her old world? Allison was there, and Allison was the only reason she'd put up with the 'idiots' around her.

"—And I expect you not to go punching third graders!"

"It was a soccer ball to the face, he'll suck it up!"

"Mello!"

Arianna barely had time to step back, almost getting a face full of door. Even so, she did get a full-body ram in from a blonde boy in black clothing.

"Watch it!" He growled, side stepping.

"You first, _Csinos lány_." Arianna grumbled, rolling her eyes.

"What'd you call me?" He snapped, before the older man behind him whistled loudly, making both kids flinch.

"Mello! Get to class!" The older man snapped. "And you, girl, just come in."

'Mello' huffed, stomping off without another word. Arianna blinked, deadpanning at the subtle bird she was flipped.

_Fanfiction writers may rest assured that their idea of Mello was thoroughly correct. As a kid, he really did have anger issues, or so it seems from this impression. _She mused absently, biting her lip. _Or perhaps it's just a bad day for him. Who knows, we'll just have to see…_

"You. You." The older gentleman said twice, waving a hand. 'Older' wasn't appropriate though; no, this man was closer to later stage of middle age, if that made sense. "Girl. Are you the new kid?"

"… I guess so." She blinked. "I'm unaware as to if any others were recently brought here."

"No need to be so precise with your words. Just because it's a house full of smart children doesn't mean we have to sound like it."

Arianna wasn't sure what had just happened—was she just criticized for being too eloquent?—but ignored it, following him into the office.

"Now he—" She assumed this to be Mr. Whammy, "—informed me of your prior situation, gave me your paperwork to do and complete. Which, might I add, was not a very pleasurable adventure, considering you have almost _no _information. But, we can fill in the gaps easy enough."

_And for all you know, I could be like the girl in _The Orphan, _and you wouldn't have a clue worth shit. _"I see. If there is anything I can fill in for you, do no—don't hesitate to ask." _There. A notch down on eloquence._

The man nodded, and asked a few boring questions that were easy enough to lie about if needed, before nodding yet again with a sigh. She noted he still hadn't introduced himself, but it was easy enough to guess that he was Roger.

"As soon as classes let out for the day, I'll send one of your classmates to show you around." He sighed, continuing on to other subjects, before finally touching one that Arianna was most interested in. "…and I'm sure you've been told that none of the children here use their real name, but instead a code name, or a nick name. You get the idea. Do you have one in mind?"

Arianna stroked at a nonexistent beard, sighing. She hadn't really thought too much on this, but she had a good idea.

"…Spade." She said after a while. "Is there anyone else here called 'Spade'? Like the playing card." _If there was any other kind._

'Roger'—presumably—blinked, before typing something on the dinosaur of a computer that was on his desk. "No. No one." He said. "Are you sure that's what you want?"

"Yeah. I'm positive." Arianna nodded.

"Then welcome, Spade." He sighed. "Please remember that from now on out, that is your name. Sharing your name with others can be a great danger to yourself, and if you are found willingly doing so, you will be punished."

_Well, that sounded rather menacing._

"I understand."

"Very well then. You may go now. _To your room._"

_Firm statement._

"Of course."

- Page Cut -

_Spade. My name is Spade. Spade, Spade, Spade. Must remember that, I must. _Arianna—Spade, as she was now—rambled internally. _Spade, Spade, Spadey-Spade-Spade. Yeah. Gotta keep that in my head. Spade._

She sighed, tapping her fingers on the desk in her bedroom as her stomach growled. Hungry with a new name. _That'd make a great book or song title._

'Hungry With A New Name'. Lovely.

Spade looked around her room, and sighed, closing her eyes.

"I guess this is home now." _But how, and why?_

* * *

A/n: Dum dum dee dum. And fillerness ends here, yo. Hope you all enjoyed this chapter. Please review, no flames, and stuff like that. And for those who are amused by Allison, take your fill now, as she wont be appearing or mentioned for a while now, so says plot bunnies.

Plot Bunny: Hell yes, heifers. She's being put in the closet for now. |D

Dice: ...Yeah. Well. Bye then, and thanks for readin'.


	6. Chapter 6

A/n: Ah, I didn't enjoy this chapter so much… But this introduction with Spade and Matt had to be done, or else I couldn't do any of the other things I wanted to. ;-; (And yes, from here on out Arianna will be referred to as Spade. It's just easier that way.)

Spade: The author would also like to apologize for her lazy-assed failure of not posting. She wants to blame things like school and the second season of Kuroshitsuji, but all excuses will be denied. The truth is, she's just too lazy to log into FF, and deserves whatever is thrown at her.

Dice: … Such a nice girl, you are. =w=

EDIT: Edited because I'm apparently a moron who can't properly list the original Pokemon. Sorry guys.

* * *

**Chapter Six: Tour Guide**

"_If I was standing on the balcony, And you were walking down below, I'd feel rather depressed and out of place, And lonely just to watch you go… If you were swinging from the highway overpass, Within the western hemisphere, I'd feel rather afraid and insincere If you began to disappear…" – Fuzzy Blue Lights, Owl City_

- Page Cut -

Spade sighed, flipping through another page of her manga with a frown. She really hated boredom with a passion. And being hungry while bored was just the worst on top.

Finally, after what seemed like hours, there was a knock at her door.

_Knock. Knock. … Knock._

She rolled her eyes a bit at the eerie slowness of it, but got up anyways. "Coming!" she called, throwing open the door. She blinked, and deadpanned. With her luck… _of course it'd be him._

Standing at her door was a redheaded boy. He was about the same height that she was, and a bit fairer of skin tone. He wore dark skinny jeans, a black and white striped shirt, and orange tinted goggles over his eyes. The boy was completely focused on the GameBoy Color in his hands.

To Spade, it was antique, but to him it was probably rather high-tech. Silly little 'time lapse' there. Technically, not even the GameBoy Advance was available here yet, much less the DS. _Note to self; don't bring out the DS Lite in front of people for a couple of years._

"Yo," he greeted unenthusiastically.

"… Hi." She blinked, staring blankly.

"I'm Matt." He added, still not looking up.

"I'm God."

At last, he looked up, with a rather confused expression. She just smirked.

"I'm Spade, actually. Though if I was God, that'd be cool."

"Aha." He blinked. "Well, thank you for needing someone to show you around. You just got me out of my last class." And an hour and a half more time to play Kirby.

Spade sweatdropped. "No problem… Matt."

"So… That showing-around-thing…" He mumbled, looking back to his game. "Yeah…" And with that, he walked off.

Spade just assumed she should follow him.

- Page Cut -

Matt was definitely a master at gaming, but he was definitely not cut out for being a tour guide.

"… That's one of the toy rooms." He mumbled, focused on his game. "And… that's another toy room. … But it doesn't have Legos."

"Thanks for the warning." She grumbled.

Spade had never had an actual problem with Matt as a character in the series. She was neither a hater nor a lover, even if she considered his character to be incredibly plain and the character arc nonexistent. But as a person…

So far, as a person, Matt annoyed the hell out of her.

"Mhm. Anytime." He muttered in response to her sarcastic gratitude, before walking on, waving nonchalantly for her to follow.

Spade's eye twitched slightly as she followed. It was one of her number one pet peeves when someone didn't put all their attention into what they were doing in order to give it their best. She'd inherited her father's tendency to be a critical perfectionist.

… And yet, she only looked for perfection in those around her. Which annoyed her to no end. _Bad habits die hard, I guess._

"And… that's another hallway. Boys' dorms, I think." Matt said, looking up for a second. "Yeah. Boys' dorms."

"Mm." Spade deadpanned as they started walking again. "Where are the classrooms?"

"…Across the main building. A few halls down. We'll have to go there later, because kids are still in class."

"Ah." She grunted, her stomach growling shamelessly. "How about the cafeteria?"

"It's alright. Better than most places."

"I mean, where is it? Because right about now, I'm considering cannibalizing on someone."

Apparently, this boy was not accustomed to her humor, and seemed a little creeped out. "I guess we can skip the dorm tours and go straight there, if it's that necessary." He blinked, adjusting his goggles. "Come on, Clover."

"It's Spade."

"… I said that."

"No, you didn't." Spade deadpanned. "You said 'Clover'. You also called me 'Ace' earlier." Which slightly aggravated her.

"… Okay. Sorry."

"No big.'

"You made it sound like it was big."

"That's what she said." Spade sighed, earning a confused stare. "Never mind. I'm just messing with you. It's fun. I'm discovering that you're kind of an easy target."

"…" Matt stared blankly. "I am?"

"You _are_ kinda gullible, kid."

"Kid? I'm not a kid. I'm nine." He said it with great pride, as if being allowed to walk across the street without a grown up was a big deal.

She deadpanned. "I'm eleven. You're a kid to me."

"You're only two years older, probably even less, counting months." Matt defended, going back to his game.

_You were born in early February of 1990, according to volume 13, and according to this world's timing I'd have been born in '98, January 13__th__… So yeah. Do the math._

"… Sure." She deadpanned. Simplified version.

"I'm not a kid." He insisted, walking off.

Spade just rolled her eyes, and let the tour continue.

- Page Cut -

Never before had a lunch in Whammy's cafeteria been so awkward. Well, it wasn't awkward for Matt, who was busy catching Pokémon, but 'Spade' was having what she momentarily had thought to be slight mini-strokes. She needed to start a conversation, and get some attention/interaction, preferably before she went mad.

"… So, uh, don't you think that Bidoof is annoying?"

"…" Matt seemed to pause for a moment, before slowly looking up. "What's a Bidoof?"

It took Spade a moment to realize the error, before paling. "I meant Caterpie."

"Oh!" Matt seemed to brighten up now that he understood the context. Pokémon, something he loved greatly. "I hate Magikarp the most, actually."

"Ha, Magikarp is fail." She laughed. "But really, Caterpie has to be the worse."

"No. It's definitely Magikarp." Matt chuckled, shaking his head. "Magikarp, then Caterpie, then… Well, I don't really like Ratatta much. But seriously." He said, laughter gone. "Magikarp is the most fail."

"Caterpie."

"Magikarp, new girl. It's Magikarp."

"Even Jesus knows Caterpie is more fail, Ginger."

"Psyduck."

"Still Caterpie." _Whom is secretly a penis innuendo, but, that aside._

"Touche. It's still Magikarp." He argued, oblivious to her thoughts surrounding his surname.

"Bite me, Goggles. It's Caterpie." She said. Let it never be said she took amusing arguments lightly.

Matt deadpanned, reluctantly putting down his GameBoy.

"Magikarp."

"…"

"Magikarp~"

"…"

"Ma~ Gi~ Karp~… Aren't we both supposed to be fighting?"

"… I got bored with it. … Okay. Um. Well. Bye." Spade blinked, walking off. As she'd said, she was bored with this Pokemon argument. Matt just wasn't too amusing to her.

_Hopefully, I can find something fun here, and possibly figure out how to go home. _She mused, chewing her sleeve as she ditched Matt and his fail tour. _Maybe this won't be so bad. Perhaps I can have fun here, if I can't get home._

Allison's face ran through her mind. The younger girl was her best friend, and she really wanted to get home.

_Depending on how time is going, or if this is even real, Allison has probably left by now, without me seeing her off. I'll definitely have to apologize later, but she'll most definitely forgive me. I'll get her a stuffed animal or something…_

_Yeah, that'll work just fine._

Matt stared after her, absolutely and utterly confused. Adjusting his goggles and resuming his gaming, he sighed.

"I really don't understand girls…"


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: First, I wanna say sorry for not updating in months. Writers block, school, the holidays, roleplaying and Kuroshitsuji II got the better of me. I promise though, this fic won't die! There's not really much in this chapter, sadly, but I promise something really good will be happening next time. ;D

Second, I need to apologize for general confusion; last chapter, it was pointed out to me that my dates and Pokemon were wrong. Bidoof and such didn't exist, blah blah blah. I got my timeline wrong, and in a rush to fix that, I had some real shoddy editing occur. Sorry, again. xD;;

Third, sorry for the awkward cuts here and there. I've been watching a lot of Baccano! and Durarara! as of late, and the style has affected my thinking and writing so much. Not to mention, it's tampered with my muse a lot… Darn it. Dx

Anyways, I hope you enjoy this one, and can forgive me for the above. Now, onto the chapter! (And, happy first update of 2011!)

* * *

**Chapter Seven: Psychosis **

"_The reward for conformity is that everyone likes you but yourself." —Rita Mae Brown._

On an average, most children are nervous about their first days of school. Spade, however, was not. If it has not already been pointed out, then let it be said now; she adored being in front of people. She adored the spotlight, the attention. Not to the point where she was obsessed with it, no, but just enough to make her spend extra time preparing herself for her first day.

"This does not at all make me overly feminine. It makes me practical, and well-bred in appearance." She consoled herself, before frowning. "Oh, whoever am I kidding? I'm just being a kiss-ass."

_Dad would make fun of me for this so, so much._

It was such an annoyance to look at herself and see a cute young girl at times; she always saw herself as a boring teenager. Sometimes, she'd even see herself as a middle-aged, chain-smoking housewife with five kids and a useless drunk for a husband, depending on her mood.

_Maybe I'm just strange… Normal eleven year olds don't focus on that crap, right?_

She shook it off, looking in the mirror again.

Spade's long brown hair was well washed and brushed, pulled into two braids on either side of her head. She'd tied them off with rubber bands someone had left under the bed—no, they weren't _too_ filthy. She still washed them off, though.

Out of the few clean pieces of clothing she had on her, she'd picked out a pair of denim capri pants, a white tank, and a light green jacket. Her dirty old black sneakers were falling apart still, but no worries, for Whammy's had electric tape.

_Electric tape is probably to duct tape what Owen Wilson __was to Jackie Chan in that one movie… _She mused absently. _Why does it really matter, though? Hmph…_

Spade began grabbing her things quickly, mumbling to herself various dates and mathematical equations she'd read up on. Her pride as a woman would not forgive her if she forgot a single one; today, she needed to be a geek. A fricking awesome geek.

If she wasn't absolutely stunning in class today, she might just kill herself. If she made a fool out of herself, she'd probably slaughter the whole classroom and then kill herself afterwards. In an artistic way, of course; like Black Swan and Higurashi—_no,_ Black Swan and _Umineko_ combined. Artistic murder was always better.

Then again, death over ego… was probably a bit of a dramatic reaction.

Spade couldn't take looking like a fool. She couldn't, and wouldn't. Not in front of these dumbass high-and-mighty British kids. Especially not if Matt was in that classroom.

_Stupid goggle-wearing dumbass nine year old ginger, with his fucking gingervitus.__ Gingervitus that apparently makes it impossible for him to identify terrible Pokémon. Fucking little bastard._

The brunette twitched at the curse-filled thoughts, before shaking her head. "Damn…" She grumbled, for no real reason, really.

- Page Cut -

_This is the most boring history class ever. I feel offended. _Spade thought bitterly, eyes glazed over and lids drooping in sleep. As a (_former_) lover of history, this boring class depressed her.

The teacher, Mrs. Byron, wasn't a bad person or a horrid woman like teachers on TV sometimes are. She was a woman in her forties, cute and a bit plump, with thin glasses. She wore lots of blue—blue blouse under a lightweight blue tweed-looking jacket and a blue skirt with white heels—and because of the ravage of color, Spade couldn't help but feel that she was listening to a blonde, less crazy and less-toadish version of Dolores Umbridge who somehow messed up her pink, primp wardrobe with the wrong spell, hence the blue.

Maybe, the main problem with Mrs. Byron—in Spade's made—was that the woman's cute Irish accent was sometimes like fingernails on a chalk board.

Or maybe it was that she was so convinced Spade was a moron with no education that every glassy-eyed look was utter confusion, not boredom or exhaustion.

_Yep, number two was probably it, actually._

"Ms. Spade," Mrs. Byron smiled pleasantly, adjusting her glasses with a light 'ahem', "since you came in later in the term, I want to make sure you're keeping up with our current discussion on the Cold War."

"Uh-huh…"

"Naturally, since your education prior to this has been basic—if not lacking in sophistication—I'll start off today with some simple review questions before we go in deeper, just to make sure you're up-to-beat! Okay? Now, please answer this question; which President of the United States was in office at the time of the Cold War?"

It took Spade a moment to absorb all the cute, plump older woman had said. She was half asleep at this point, and she'd barely absorbed anything be the insult on her prior education.

Spade scratched the back of her ear awkwardly, thinking hard.

"Was it the president who fucked his mistress in the Oval Office?"

- Page Cut -

_Well, it seems that I have become degraded to being the girl in the movie who sits in the library alone to eat lunch. Maybe this is karma for killing someone in a past life? I probably deserve death myself. Stupid person writing the fanfiction of my life._

The overly dramatic thoughts were like a pesky dog, biting on the juicy steak that was Spade's sanity. She wished she was a more optimistic, giddy sort of person who could say "it's okay that I made a fool of myself in front of a class of geniuses, and landed myself in detention for saying the F-word! I'm still awesome! I can make friends!"

Alas, Spade was not. She was a pessimist with a lot of pride. Her pride was currently telling her that maybe—just maybe—it could patch the wound by going up to eat on the roof.

_Bad-ass girls eat on the roof, right?_

Standing with a slight pout, she gripped her tray, exiting and proceeding to head to where she thought the stairs to the roof were. (Spade figured that's what those stairs were, anyways. There wasn't anywhere else for them to go, really…)

She was so close to her destination, too—_and then _he_ showed up._

She recognized him from her class; he sort of had some weird allure that made him stand out. He wasn't really attractive or anything, really. He was just a dorky looking boy, probably her age, maybe a little older. He had choppy blonde hair that was mussed and greased, probably in an attempt to 'gel it up', and wore large, stereotypically geek black-framed glasses. His brown eyes were narrowed in disgust. _Disgust with her, maybe? _She couldn't help but notice the overuse of cologne or the acne on his face that was covered with makeup.

Add all of that to the way he dressed like some kid from _The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air's _era, and she couldn't help but feel that he was trying a _little_ too hard to be cool.

"You're the new one, right?" He asked. For some reason, it sounded a bit like an insult.

_The way you're looking at me makes me feel mentally violated. Stop it. _"Yes. Why do you ask?"

The boy smirked slightly, pushing his glasses up his nose. "You may not know me yet, but you will. I'm Warren—"

"I thought we didn't use real names here." Spade said flatly, face deadpanned.

"Warren _is_ my codename." 'Warren' groaned, putting a hand to his forehead in immediate exasperation.

"I see." Spade blinked. "No offense, but that's a pretty lame codename."

"…" Warren glared. "_Ahem._ As I was saying, new girl; you don't know it yet—you don't know me yet—but you will. I'm number eight around here, and soon, I'll be number one. When I'm the next L, things _will_ be different."

Spade shuffled her foot. "Good for you. Why are you telling me this?" _This feels like a dramatic encounter from a manga. How cheesy. If my life is a fanfiction, someone should tell the moronic person writing it to be at least a tad bit less cliché. I mean, really..!_

"Because," Warren went on, "if you're nice to me, I'll make you my underling."

"… How thoughtful of you, to offer something so blatantly… awesome?"

"I know, right? Not many people—especially women—have the guts to say something like you did in class. It was kind of nice." He said, grinning and almost glowing with pride. _Pride that was so similar to Spade's. _"It's why I'm offering _you_ this position! Be honored."

Spade tilted her head. She was temporarily unranked, but she got the feeling she had something over this guy buried deep down in her gut.

This Warren guy was number eight, and he probably had the right to act so pompous. All the same, he still kind of pissed her off… And at the same time, she sort of dug that stereotypical geek/megane boy thing he had going on—until she suddenly got this feeling deep down that it made her a sex offender. Any pre-pubescent attraction was crushed epically.

"Has anyone ever told you that 'Warren' sounds like 'Worm'?" Spade asked, sighing as she side-stepped him. "Worm is a better codename. Go with it."

"…"

The blonde boy watched her go curiously, and tried to figure out if he'd just been insulted or not.

_What a freak, _he mused idly, frowning a bit.

- Page Cut -

"_No, sir, I do not bite my thumb at you, sir, but I bite my thumb, sir." –Sampson, Romeo and Juliet (Act 1, Scene 1)_

- Page Cut -

"Twerps. All of them." Spade grumbled, shaking her head.

Whammy's House just seemed to full with annoyances.

There was Matt, the dumbass ginger; Mello, the violent blonde; Wormy Warrenkins, the pompous bitch… And those were just the ones she'd met. She hadn't seen Near around, and hadn't attempted to socialize with anyone else. _It wasn't like she wanted to, anyways. _All the kids here were major dweebs.

Formerly fictitious dweebs.

Seriously, what the hell was she doing here? This was a minor location in a manga, for Kira's sake! It couldn't be real…

Shoving the ham and cheese sandwich into her mouth with a sigh, she fiddled with her bag, frowning. Now that this was on her mind, she was getting a serious headache. _No eleven year old can deal with this alone… Heh, maybe I'm going crazy or something. It would make sense; mom was a nut job, maybe it's genetic…_

Pulling out the notebook and pen in her bag, she hummed, writing down a few possibilities—vaguely, of course, in case someone tried to read her notes later—for how she could have gotten here.

_a) I'm insane.  
__b) Never existed, and this is a dream.  
c) Comatose dreams. Cliché, cliché.  
__d) I'm secretly Haruhi and recreated the world in my ideal image._

Spade stared blankly at the world's lamest list of possibilities, tilting her head at her chicken scratch writing. It looked like a doctor's handwriting, or possibly a psychopath's…

Again, something hinting at her insanity. Drat.

Glancing down at the kids playing in the yard below, Spade couldn't help but grimace.

"God, I hate this place."

* * *

A/n: Ohhei, there was Worm. :'D I was pretty eager to get him back in here, at least with just a minor appearance. Since I restarted this fanfiction, I've been working a lot on his personality, and developing him out with the help of RPing (thanks, Emzy!). I really like him now, as a character- not as a person-, and hope you guys will come to enjoy the lulz that are Wormy, too. :)

References:::

_Gingervitus – _Gingervitus is a hereditary disease that is growing increasingly common, and is something we all should be aware of. Please check out the following site (eliminate the spaces) for more information. **Gingerpeople . org / what-is-gingervitis /** (I haven't gotten a virus from it, so no worries.)

_Megane_ – A Japanese term for a person who wears glasses (usually a man). Can be used as a type. _"Oh, I'm totally into megane types!",_ etc.

_"Was it the president who fucked his mistress in the Oval Office?" _– A crack on the Lewinsky scandal, aka Monicagate, aka Lewinskygate, that I just couldn't resist using when writing this. The result of Spade mixing up dates.

_"No, sir, I do not bite my thumb at you, sir, but I bite my thumb, sir." –Sampson, Romeo and Juliet _– If you're familiar with Shakespeare and the meaning of this term, you'll know why it was placed there. ;D

Until next time (in the VERY near future),  
-Dice


	8. Chapter 8

EDIT PART 2: I just realized how many reviews we have. 96! ... Hm. 100th review gets a special treat! ;D

A/n: Well, just as planned. This chapter gets to be released on time! Expect an update every other Friday from now on; the official updating schedule for all of my ongoing fanfiction is on my profile now, as well as a poll. :3

Also, after going back and rereading… God! I cringe at the first chapters, and there are so many details that I need to fix! I'll post the edits tomorrow possibly.

This chapter is self beta'd again; sorry! D: I'm working on getting a beta, so sorry sorry sorry for any errors! Also, please bear with my choppy writer's block. Hope you enjoy it anyways.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

EDIT PART 1: My friend pointed out all the spacing errors. WTF, FF? Ugh. Sorry. Fixed them. I think.

* * *

**Chapter Eight: Scientific Brilliance**

_"I know as well as anyone that the intellectual is a dangerous animal ever ready to betray." –Albert Camus_

"How frustrating…"

Spade fiddled with her DS game in aggravation, watching as her Magikarp finally evolved into a Gyarados with a huff. It was really about time; this stubborn, useless fish had taken her ages to evolve.

Clinging to the crimson gaming system, she sighed. This was one of the few things that reminded her of her original location, years ahead of the current date. It made her feel a little saner, knowing that place did indeed exist somewhere. If it wasn't for this, her Death Note manga, and other various trinkets that currently didn't exist, she'd feel ultimately depressed.

Hell, even with them, she felt depressed.

_Think of the upside, Arianna, _Spade mused, internally kicking herself at the use of her real name—even just mentally it was a setback—as she leaned back in her bed, _you get to live through the creation and rise of the FullMetal Alchemist fandom—if Ed and Al exist in this world, at least. You get see everything good and bad fall._

_You get the power of knowing everything that will _most likely, probably _happen up until springtime of 2013._

She tapped her bottom lip with the elongated Pikachu DS stylus, and smiled lightly.

She hadn't thought about the power she had over everyone, really. Not until this very moment.

Spade realized she could predict so many things. Fads, stocks, upcoming movies and music and etcetera, terrorist attacks, major government movements, and what sports team would win what. She could save nations, make money, and be the total badass on every online community that knew everything from the start… all because of being a living pop culture Bible. One who lived with a father who loved the news and automobile company stocks, and at another point, with an elderly couple who only watched the news.

She could be something amazing…

"… No." She decided aloud, sitting the DS beside her.

Spade smirked, chewing her sleeve again with a slightly hysteric giggle. Her eyes lit up at the thought of seeing everyone surprised over everything—living through the panic of war and Twilight without a care in the world.

_Let the world suffer. _She decided. _They need to learn a lesson, anyways. T_ _he attacks and deaths made them grow, right? The worst thing that could happen is all those dumb airport laws that are the result anyways!_

The lives didn't mean much to her. She may be smart, but she was only eleven…

Spade hummed, bouncing off the bed and wandering to her bookshelf. The semi-maniacal smirk was still on her face as she found one of the diaries, and pulled it out of the shelf, opening it up.

Passing her list of the possible ways she'd gotten to this world, Spade began writing on the blank page things to invest in and bet on, and dates.

"I _always_ promised you that I would do well for myself, Dad." She murmured absently, a small, content giggle passing her lips.

- Page Cut -

_Is this how Harry Potter felt whenever Snape was looking over his potions work?_

Spade couldn't help mulling over the question with a blank expression as she watched the young blonde man—her science teacher, Leonard Fulzer—fuss over her chemistry set as he went over what she'd prepared. She sighed internally, closing her eyes; _This is taking too long…_

"S," Fulzer frowned, making eye level with her first test tube. "The color on this one isn't right. Did you include the powder mix?"

"Oh, no…" Spade said apathetically, frowning. She lazily reached over and picked up the small orange cardboard box. "This, right?"

"Yes. Now remember, only ½ a cup, S."

"Yeah, yeah." Spade rolled her eyes, popping opening the box. If only she was Edward Elric, she could probably just eyeball this. _Maybe I could anyways. _"Meh, no need to be stiff!"

Fulzer gasped, lunging out of the way as Spade poured the mix in carelessly.

"Take cover!"

_Bang!_

- Page Cut -

The bells rang out across the Whammy House campus.

_Finally, the end of the day._

He hadn't even been in class—it's not like it was required, right?—and he was sick of it.

Eyes glanced out the dorm window absently as the residents filed outside, either for club activities or because they had permission to go into the city, or they just intended to hang out on the nice, sunny day. No one could blame them for the latter two of the three; nice days seemed to be rare.

Did Whammy's even have good club activities? With the identities of its residents and true purpose so confidential, it's not like they could actively compete with other schools. He probably should know these details, shouldn't he? Then again, socializing like that… _it wasn't his thing._

Only about ten minutes had passed, and he could already hear the rumble in the halls as students passed by; he sighed, tapping his pen against the notebook page. He didn't want to study anymore. He was growing so _bored_.

His roommate entered, and his disdained frown grew.

"What's wrong?"

_Oh, he noticed._

"Nothing. Just a headache from reading." _Smile nicely so he won't notice. Pretend you don't see those nasty reminders and just go on._

"Maybe you should go outside for a bit and get some fresh air. Even _I _can get

frustrated in this dusty dorm room!" The shorter boy chuckled, brushing back some of his brown hair.

"Hm, maybe I will." _Yeah, that would be nice._

He stood, stretching lightly and wandering out of the room, not bothering to close the door.

"Be back later, I guess!" He called back, grinning wickedly now that he couldn't see his roommate's face anymore.

_Much, muuuuch better!_

- Page Cut -

"Can you believe the irony in this?"

"I can." _All of this is supposedly a manga; after landing here, nothing can really surprise me._

"Really? I can't." The blonde—Warren Wormykins or something like that; Spade didn't really give a crap about his name until she determined him to have a good character arc—said with a smile. "I mean, I come onto you —in a platonic form of course—and a few days later we're partners for a science project. Usually, someone temporarily unranked wouldn't even get someone has high up as I am. You must be a _really _lucky girl!"

_I wouldn't put it that way. There is no luck; just logic._

"I just made a desk explode, and practically burned the science lab." Spade hummed. "It's logical they would want to assign me to a classmate with good grades in science to tutor me." _And one without much prospect or a social life is the perfect choice. _"Your help is appreciated, but please don't get cocky."

Warren laughed, adjusting his glasses as he eyes her. She wondered how the bones in his face managed supported such a massive pair of glasses.

"Okay. What do you plan to do if I do get cocky, though?" He asked with a chuckle as they turned the corner, entering the House library.

_Either my mind is degraded by Panty & Stocking, or you are a pervert, good sir._

"I'll use my ninjutsu on you."

The blonde boy blinked in confusion, eying her as he instinctively made his way to the science books, reaching far-too-knowingly to grab a few. "What's that?"

Spade's brain seemed jolt inside her skull. For some reason, it frustrated her to no end when people didn't know what she meant. It made _her_ seem like the crazy one—oh, _wait, _there's _another_ hint at her insanity! Maybe Japan didn't exist at all here. Maybe there was just England and Russia (because no matter what, Russia always exists, according to the internet).

"Ninjutsu is the martial art, strategy, and tactics of unconventional warfare and guerrilla warfare as well as the art of espionage and is often practiced by shinobi."

"… What?"

"Shinobi, or to a blatant noob such as yourself, a _ninja._"

"Oh! Like in those movies." Warren blinked, before shrugging. "My private history lessons so far haven't gone towards Asian history and such, and out of the five languages I picked to take none of them were Chinese or Japanese so…"

_Fucking brat._

"It's understandable."

Warren smiled again, as if she wasn't giving him the 'I want you dead for some reason' stare.

"What else do shinobi do, besides ninjutsu?"

_Is this dork humoring me? He's humoring me. Oh, hell no._

Spade sighed, scratching her neck as she thought about the many hours spent on Wikipedia and YouTube when she could have been saving puppies or something helpful to mankind. "There's a lot of stuff. The only ones I studied about were taijutsu, kenjutsu, bōjutsu, naginatajutsu, shurikenjutsu, and… yeah, stuff like that."

"… Why?"

"I figured that they'd help me out a lot in the zombie apocalypse, or whenever terrorists took over. After watching a lot of anime, reading manga, and stalking the Asian kids at my school who followed the stereotypes and learned such things, I figured it was either this, karate, or whatever Chuck Norris does." Spade rambled, frowning a bit more. "But, everybody does karate—even the zombies—so that seemed pretty dumb. And as for the other… I don't want to try to be like god, because living up to Chuck Norris is too hard and I'd only disappoint myself. So, shinobi arts."

Warren tugged at his collar awkwardly, and coughed, looking back to the shelf as if to avoid the stare she was giving him. "O-oh, I see…" He mumbled, smiling a bit. "Okay… Ah, what are anime and manga, anyways? More ninja/shinobi arts or something?"

_Oh my god._

"Uh, Japanese animation and comics, hello." _You technically live in one, moron. _"

I was thinking _Naruto_, specifically." _Or maybe Nabari no Ou, among a possible trillion others._

"You must be pretty up to date." Someone commented with a hum. Spade blinked, looking around the library. She thought it had come from the next isle over. "Didn't _Naruto_ only come out in Japan a few weeks ago?"

For a split second, Spade's heart soared. _Brethren?_

"Ah, it did…" Spade mumbled, peeking between the gaps in shelves, trying to get an idea of where her salvation was. _Sounds like a male, not an adult though… So far, no one I recall meeting, and the voice doesn't resemble anyone in the anime… _"My connections are just that awesome, though." As in, years ahead of the current ones.

"I have connections too, actually. Though, I didn't feel much interest in _Naruto_; I haven't bothered to pick up that title." There was a chuckle from the other person; Spade noticed it made Warren jump. "I must admit… It's good to see the innovative nerd in someone so young!"

"I s'pose." Spade muttered, peering around the shelf to the next isle. No one was there. "You like anime and stuff too?"

"Yep!" The voice was almost malicious with giddiness; this time, Spade was the one to jump. "_Neon Genesis Evangelion_ is nice, wouldn't you agree?"

Spade wondered if this was a test somehow as she scanned down the gaps in the other shelf, trying to find the mystery person. "Yeah, it's really good. Gainax has a real treasure with that one." _They'll have Panty & Stocking and Fooly Cooly, too. Good company, that one._

"What other series are you interested in, hm~?"

_Let's see, let's see, what era of series can I even name from?_

"I've been reading one from the 80s called _Miss Machiko_ that is seriously amusing. If only we had teachers like that here, I'd be a lot more interested in student/teacher interactions." She joked dryly, pushing aside two math books. _Nope, not here. _"I absolutely adore _Birdy the Mighty_, and _Ranma ½_ is good, too…"

There was a silence, and she frowned. "_Ghost in the Shell _and _Saint Seiya_, too…"

"Oh!" The voice gasped, making both kids jump this time. "I just finished reading _Saint Seiya_. It was alright."

Spade blinked, moving down the isle further. She came to a couple of bigger algebra books, and gulped, before pushing them apart.

Her gray eyes came into contact with a pair of black ones, and a sense of light déjà vu came over her.

"Hello!" The male on the other side chirped, chuckling.

Spade simply tilted her head, staring blankly. "Hello…"

Warren came to her side, blinking as he peered into the hole. He tilted his head, moving back and walking around the shelf. "Y-you…!"

"Me~"

A tall brunette boy in his teens came out, smiling in a slightly strange way. He nodded once to W, ruffling the younger boy's hair, before looking to Spade. She eyed him a bit curiously; _tall, at least part Asian, a bit cute… Something about that smile, though…_

"Not many people here at Whammy's like manga. It's a treat."

"I'd bet," she mumbled, still watching him. She couldn't shake the odd feeling of déjà vu still, and it was starting to give her a headache. Spade sighed internally, furrowing her eyebrows. "You're the first fan I've met so far…"

"Hm." He shrugged, chuckling. "I wouldn't consider myself too hardcore, really. I'm a casual reader of just about everything. Gotta keep my repertoire broad."

"Of course." Spade hummed.

He watched her curiously for a moment, not bothering to share his name, before smiling at Warren. The blond jumped into attention, arms stiff at his side. "Aren't you supposed to be helping with the football team, W?" The older boy asked with a chuckle.

_Football? Oh, soccer, hm…_

"Y-yes sir…" Warren gulped, face turning red.

"No need to be so awkward. Come on, I'll walk you out. I promised to play around today anyways."

"K-kay…"

"W, I'll come, too." Spade sighed, walking over to his side. Mostly, she just wanted more time with this guy; he reminded her of someone, and she refused to let it go yet. "Hm, I wonder what you do for the sports teams. You honestly don't seem like the type."

Warren coughed into his hand. "Towel boy."

"Oh_-ho_." She smiled lightly, fiddling with one of her braids. "Of course." _Because this whole place is a stereotype._

"Well, come along now," the older boy chirped, "let's get going!"

- Page Cut -

"Alright," W sighed, eyes glancing to the small soccer—er, _football_—field. "S, the papers I gave you are my notes. Just read those and it should be alright."

"Mm." _Fine._ "Have fun being some football player's bitch, W."

"H-hey!"

The older boy laughed, ruffling the blonde nerd's hair again, before waving him off. W looked between both brunettes, oddly confused and nervous, before running off.

"Nice kid."

Spade looked up at the boy, lips pursed. "Sure, s'pose he is." At least he wasn't a total bastard.

If only she could tell what this guy was.

"Well, nice to meet you." He shrugged. "I gotta go meet up with… yeah." He smiled, patting her head once. And then, just as W had, he ran off.

Spade watched as he made his way to some younger kids, standing beside a blonde girl his age. She smiled, leaning up and kissing his cheek, practically hanging off his arm. He casually shrugged the gesture off, frowning for a barely-noticeable second—and then he was smiling again, looking happy and carefree as ever. _Stupid teenaged girls, can't she see he's annoyed by her?_

"And here, I never got his na—"

"Hey, B!" Someone—_Mello no less—_called, waving a hand as he ran past her. Spade's eyes widened momentarily.

_No, no, no…_

Mello made his way to the older brunette, saying something inaudible to him with enthusiasm. They high-fived, and the blonde boy ran, joining some other kids in a game of football.

_B._

_B._

_B._

"…"

Spade's face heated rapidly in frustration, before she laughed, something oddly hysteric in it. Still chuckling, she starting walking back inside, suddenly wanting a very long nap.

This _had_ to be a fanfiction. It was just too… too…

_Ugh._

* * *

A/n: -dodges tomatos- Come onnn. It had to happen _eventually._ :P

Though, I'm half way expecting all my satirical, hypocritical mockery of fanfiction in upcoming chapters to get me killed.

For those of you on Twitter, due to extreme boredom and my fascination with the Twitter app… Spade is now Tweeting. If you're on, feel free to follow her. (My Twitter username is JiseiHakushaku. Just sayin'.)

And as promised; bios will start this chapter! (Next time is Wormy. :/)

**Name: **Spade (S)  
**Age: **11  
**Height: **4'01"  
**Weight: **107 lbs  
**Details: **H: Brown, E: Grey, R: _prime_. Hungarian/Native American  
**Likes: **Marshmallows, anime/manga, Hungarian food.  
**Hates: **Ignorance, imperfection, gingervitus and its carriers.  
**Special Skills: **Hotwiring cars, being a pop culture bible, shinobi martial arts.  
**Etc: **Has a massive ego. Tends to think she's a pimp.


	9. Chapter 9

A/n: As you will easily be able to tell from this chapter (not to mention the delay for it), I have come down with a bad case of writers block. Though, now that I got through this chapter, it should be easier to writer.

Maybe.

Next chapter I promise actual noteworthy stuff with happen.

Disclaimer: Hint? I'm writing fanfiction.  
Also, I'm looking for a beta still. Sorry for any major spelling errors. I'll try to go back and correct them soon. I'm also editing earlier chapters, too.

* * *

**Chapter Nine: Filler and Plot**

"_Do not carry a spirit of contradiction, for it is to be freighted with stupidity and with peevishness, and your intelligence should plot against it; though it may well be the mark of mental genius to see objection, a wrangler about everything cannot." –Baltasar Gracian_

- cut -

Uneventful weekends were the bane of her existence.

There was nothing to do but people-watch, there was no one to hang out with besides her new nerd—and he wasn't even a cool nerd!—and there was nothing to read because nothing decent existed yet.

It truly sucked at Whammy's House.

- cut -

_Dear diary in my mind,  
__Here is yet another mundane filler entry containing pointless emo angst and—obviously—filler that I'm too paranoid to put onto paper._

_I'm officially declaring myself an atheist out of spite for whatever god that sent me here. It's quite possible that I'm dead and this is my fangirl hell. Whammy's House may be cool, but the lack of super weeaboo neko moe desu makes my heart ache. Everything in life that I love has yet to exist. I'm pretty sure the concept of Blu-Ray hasn't even been thought of yet. I can't bring out my DS Lite for fear of creating a tear in that space/time thing, and for the same reason my iPod is in hiding—life without background music might as well not be worth living._

_And one of the worst parts?_

_Pokémon games are actually _difficult_ here._

_It's like a whole new world. I just can't function._

_And that's not even the half of it, Mental Diary that proves my decline to insanity. This W kid that's now my tutor won't leave me the hell alone. He keeps talking about bullshit I only want to hear from my darling husbendo/waifu, Edward Elric. When he says it, it just sounds like that Friday song. If Edward was saying it… Oh my…_

_Right now, the only thing I have to fill the void of lonely emo child emptiness is watching Beyond Birthday make out with girls from the roof. And even that simple joy has become corrupted. __**By him.**_

"And hydrogen is…"

"Why do you only talk about science?" Spade sighed, not sparing a glance at the blonde beside her. She was far too interested in watching B—_true name; Beyond Birthday_—through some binoculars she'd found in the lost and found earlier. Technically not stealing, right? "It's boring. You're boring me to death, W. I'm going to fall asleep and fall off the roof and _die_. You do realize how tragic that would be, wouldn't you? Despite being super duper brilliant, I am still only eleven years of age—just barely of age to be a decent witch… If I die now, who knows how the universe will become unsettled! Oh, the horror!"

Her monotone somehow had an underlying dramatic hint to it. Especially at the end of her longwinded speech.

Warren huffed indignantly. He couldn't stand the girl sometimes—actually, most of the time. _Or all of the time._

"I'm supposed to be tutoring you, S." He said seriously. A small smile momentarily flashed across her lips—accompanied by a slightly mad giggle—before she grimaced and blanched. Warren had no interest in finding out what she was watching, and even less interest in what was inducing her strange reactions. "If you're not even going to try and focus on your studies, then I'm leaving!"

"Fine, then. Leave."

For some reason, the carefree way she said it made him unable to stand. Or perhaps it was his fear of falling. Either way, Warren found himself planted firmly in his seat despite his strong desire to flee—er, _leave_.

Noticing this, Spade smirked mischievously, obviously taking this as a sign to feel accomplished. When she gave him a teasing "I told you so, Wormykins," sort of look from the corner of her eye, he couldn't help but cringe away slightly in shame at his weakness. The brunette pouted ever so slightly, truly looking cute for a moment, before returning her attention to whatever entertainment those binoculars were providing her, as well as a bored expression.

After a moment, he cleared his throat awkwardly. "…You should really consider focusing on your studies more. There's no greater shame than arriving in the highest class and then _immediately _falling to the bottom, you know." He muttered bitterly, though seemed to be slowly letting it go.

"So it would seem." Spade hummed. "I will focus eventually, don't worry. Now's just not the time for that." She explained, before resuming what Warren had decided to classify as stalking.

A silence passed. It was all peaceful and actually nice for once.

And then Spade ruined it.

"My, I marvel at the ability of a girl who can so persistently tongue someone. I mean, really!" She exclaimed, the strange smile back on her face. It was eerily giddy, and resembled the smile of a complete maniac. "_My_ tongue doesn't have the stamina to do all that work. Does yours, W?"

Warren's eyes widened and his face heated; what kind of question was that, anyways?

"What the heck are you watching?"

"B and that blonde he seems to be dating!" exclaimed the brunette, awe leaking through her tone. "This whole time they have been—how do you say it here? Snogging or something, right? Teenagers are so strange, but so interesting." _Does this somehow explain the fascination people have with Jersey Shore? Ooh, when that show starts airing over here, I definitely need to do a social studies project on Snooki—!_

"What are you, some perverted old man?"

_Absolutely._

"Y-you shouldn't spy on people!"

Spade looked at him now, gray eyes narrowed.

_Who are you to order me around, blonde little worm? _She bit back the words as she sat the goggles in her lap, sighing. "I wouldn't call it spying. I'm investigating. Y'know? Isn't investigating part of being a detective?" She feigned innocence as she spoke, internally wishing she could just push W off of the roof. The mere thought made her happy. She didn't like the way he scrutinized her. She'd long since deemed him to be a cynic.

…No, she wasn't sure what that was; it sounded bad though, didn't it?

"Well, yes, but you shouldn't _spy_on B of all people!" Warren gasped, snatching the binoculars from her. He could have sworn there was now a fire burning in her eyes. "It's not polite! He's our superior! Not to mention, a very good person… and our superior! Why on earth would you spy on B?"

_Give a few years, hon. Nobody'll be thinking he's that good of a person after the LA murder case… _

"Actually, I'm God. I'm superior to all of you. Your point is invalid, good sir!" She huffed, crossing her arms over her chest and puffing out her cheeks.

Warren sighed, rather exasperated. "Of course you are. And stop faking a British accent, it's almost offensive. You're rather terrible at it."

Spade ignored him, snatching the binoculars back and observing again. "And now he's got a redhead all over him! How the hell did that happen?" She gasped, sounding on the verge of a tantrum now. "Thanks a lot, Wormy! You made me miss it with this pointless filler conversation! God, you must be the character that the author throws into the mix in the beginning chapters whenever they can't think of something better to write."

"…Filler? …Author? Since when were we a story?" The blonde deadpanned.

As usual, he didn't get what she was talking about. And for once, it wasn't just because she blabbered it all out in broken Hungarian.

"B's more interesting than you. He knows about _Evangelion_." Spade huffed, that annoying near-tantrum tone of hers from before still very present.

"Pardon me for not having an interest in that weird anime stuff—"

She cut him off with a particularly piercing glare. Never before had Spade felt such contempt for a person—not even the hate for her mother, the social workers, or Enoby Way could compare to this.

"I'm going to strip you of your confidence like a hunter strips muscle from bone."

"…"

Warren found his footing once again and was able to leave after that, the brunette still trying to murder him with glares even after he was long out of sight.

- Cut -

Without Warren's presence, Spade felt a lot freer. For some reason, with that boy around, everything just felt so cramped and stuffy—even her thoughts. He wasn't fun to be with like Allison, and he wasn't a total hottie, so she couldn't use hormones as an excuse to tolerate him. Warren irritated her so much, and she knew that if she wasn't careful she would just snap and push him off the roof or down some stairs or something. _Does that make me a bad person? _She wondered absently, twirling a strand of her hair.

Sighing, Spade stood and began the awkward walk to the exit.

"I wonder what to do about all of this," she mused to herself, abnormally chipper. "B is definitely a cool character, as far as minor ones go. His novel was fantastic, too! Hm… What would a fanfiction character do? Besides fuck the boy, of course." She was trying hard to avoid treading the Mary-Sue turf at this point, though some of the hilarity of doing so was kind of irresistible. "Seeing as how females are all over him, who knows what he might have… Then again, I think a relationship like ours would be would border on lolicon. Ooh, but lolicon is kind of hot… No, no, I'm honestly not interested in a sexual relationship or a romantic one—at all." Spade pouted a bit. "Though… Note to self! Get B's DNA so I can make clones of him in the future."

_Yes, yes, that will be perfect!_

Spade rolled her eyes subconsciously, opening the small door and carefully walking through.

"I'm basically just wandering around, creating pages of filler story." She mused. "So far it's all meaningless. There's no point to it. This is really a boring read, most likely. Hmph… This all feels likes it's missing something… But what?" She mumbled, blinking.

Spade suddenly paused as a thought hit her. "Oh! Of course! Why didn't I realize that before? Silly me."

_It's missing an original plot!_

- Cut -

It only took one long conversation with the voices in her head to figure out what she wanted to do. It took even less time to know how she wanted to begin it. She praised the confidence that her genius status gave her, smirking wickedly all the while and playing the appropriate background music to set the mood. She memorized the melody completely for future playback in her mind.

Everything that she needed was set up and ready. All that was needed was her opportunity.

Unfortunately, despite being in an anime—_or manga,_ she noted—it seemed that Spade was not a main character type. That or whoever was planning her story wasn't too kind to her, circumstance-wise.

She actually had to look into things herself. Information did not just come to her casually. She wished she could have the same circumstances as the characters in _Hell Girl_ did, but instead of overhearing cute girls talk about the devil's best website, she'd overhear information on a housemate that was practically a legend of some kind.

In the same way that information did not drop into her hands, timing seemed to be in everyone else's favor but her own.

(_What does that mean, you ask? _Spade mused to the audience she almost prayed did not exist. _Well, we're talking about opportunity!_)

Opportunities were not so easy to come by, it seemed; they did not just fall into place perfectly whenever she needed them. Her opportunity required a week of observation to acquire, and a lot of research as well.

Finally though, her opportunity came.

It was a sunny day after a heavy rain. Puddles of mud and water and nature-y goop were all around. Children sploshed around merrily and did things most people would find really cute.

An older boy who looked like the definition of an unhealthy pasty beast joined them, laughing and stumbling as he was hugged and tackled into the puddles.

From the swing-set, his friend watched, sucking absently at the pack of jam in his hand. A small smile was on his face. If one looked closely, they'd see how sad it was.

Ignoring the secretly heartbreaking mood, though, she made her move.

"It must be sad to know that A's going to die soon, huh?"

B seemed to pause momentarily, looking at the girl with the bag of marshmallows. She smiled cutely at him, bangs falling in her eyes and braids bouncing as she skipped to the swing beside him.

Clenching the bag between her teeth as she sat, Spade immediately set to twisting the swing around.

"…" B smiled 'curiously', hiding whatever emotion he was experiencing perfectly. Perhaps some grand mixture of confusion, annoyance, surprise, and hunger—the latter because he realized he had no more jam, of course. "What are you talking about?"

"You don't have to pretend!" She managed between clenched teeth, still twisting the swing as best she could, legs stretching to keep contact with the ground so as to not only continue twisting her, but to hold back her release. "I know everything, B.B."

B blinked, raising an eyebrow. He didn't think this girl was the type to have the eyes…

"Oh, and how is that?"

Spade clenched her teeth around the bag tighter, before allowing herself to let go. The swing spun madly, and she laughed hysterically—teeth still holding the bag in place.

Minutes later, when it came to stop, she smiled at him and laughed on, breathless and disheveled. He looked so impatient, and that only made her giggle more.

"Because, silly," she began, "I've got the greatest power ever up in _here._"

Pointing to her head, she only smiled wider.

"It's a little something called Mary Sue knowledge. Y'know, y'know?"


End file.
